Dear Humans - MyMoon

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All quiet on the twitter front.

DEAR HUMANS

I had not planned on saying anything about this but with your renewed interest in reaching my surface, coupled with what has happened in the past, I have a concern. I understand that you have recently begun to truly examine this issue on your own planet and are taking the first small steps to correct it. However, no steps have been taken to rectify this issue on my own surface. This issue of course, is littering. Your littering, to be exact.

Humans have been cluttering my surface with objects for a little over fifty years now. To date I have counted over seventy large, man-made objects on my surface, not counting the mirrors, golfballs, flags, statues, and other small personal items scattered here and there. Of those seventy only around twenty-five were placed gently. Thirty or so I am willing to give the benefit of the doubt as they crashed on my surface accidentally. The rest were embedded in my surface during what seemed to be peaceful scientific experiments.

I am currently attempting to locate the owners of all this junk. Of those I have located so far, I have attempted to contact one Mr. E.E. Aldrin, and after learning of the current owner of one of the car/tank hybrids on my surface I have attempted to contact one R.A. Garriott. I have yet to hear back from either. Should anyone know either party, I would appreciate it if you could let them know I am trying to contact them regarding their tidiness issues. I have also become aware that one person may have lost his wedding rings on my surface during your latest attack on me. I am willing to believe that this act was just an accident, and when I locate the rings I will let him know so that he may retrieve them.

If this refuse is not picked up soon, I may have to take some form of action. I have not decided what that action will be, but please keep in mind that I control your tides. I am not saying that I wish harm on anyone; I am a peaceful, loving celestial body. All I am saying is that I may have to issue a citation or something. And I control tides. The sooner you can get here and clean up, the better. You may wish to let me know your arrival time by contacting me through Twitter at @ToddTheMoon. If you do so, please remember to factor in the three days it takes to reach my surface. Please hurry, it's getting lonely up here; I haven't seen a human in thirty-eight years.

In the future, please collect your trash on the way out.

Sincerely,

Todd (the Moon)

COMMUNITY COMMENTS:

Maggie S.

Sunday Nov-28-2010

LOL, leave it to us humans to get tired of leaving our junk everywhere here on earth and dumping on you. Poor ToddtheMoon. Maybe you can sue Mr. Aldrin and Co. for illegal dumping.


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